An Interview with Sam Razberry

Sam feels her feelings like it’s her job…because it is. Crying often as a means to process and release, she strives to uncover all her deepest wounds and salve them with aloe. You can find Sam at her favorite coffee shop (literally named “Poets”) sipping an iced vanilla chai and eating something delicious on a croissant while she scribbles poems into one of her many half-filled notebooks, living her best main-character life.

What inspired you to start writing this book?

At first I was just battling the winter sads and a need for creative expression. I had so many journals I refused to fill out of fear of “ruining” them with mistakes. Everything had to be in pencil, because a pencil is forgiving; erasers are a godsend to crippling OCD. I needed to break out of the freeze I was in, and just create with reckless abandon—mistakes and all. Being the all-or-nothing gal I am, I decided writing in one of my most prized journals (handmade by yours truly) in permanent marker was the only way to go.

It was slow at the start. Tenuous words tiptoed onto the page, each holding the hand of the next, tugging them along until I built up confidence and speed. Prose began to flow. Scratchouts here and there. Rewrites in the spaces between each line I hurriedly wrote in an effort to outrun the looming anxiety that stood behind me, witnessing each jarringly imperfect stroke of ink. Before I knew it, I had developed a nightly writing routine, a kind of sacred meditation to process years of unmet needs and festering wounds.

By the time I finished that journal (plus two others), I realized I had quite the little haul of prose, and began entertaining the idea of publishing. I had always dreamed of being a published author, and in today’s world of self-publishing options, I knew I could accomplish it myself. I spent a year organizing my work into separate projects, choosing which project to start with first, sequencing the pieces, writing more poems to fill out a chapbook, drafting, editing, editing, and editing some more.

In September of 2022, I self-published Being Human: You Signed Up For This for the first time. It was a gift to myself, and paid homage to my journey as a human and a writer. Two years and a few dozen poems later, I published Being Human’s second edition, which included brand-new pieces, revised poems, guided journaling, mental health resources, a playlist, and sneak peeks into future works. This one is for me, as always, but it was also written for those hearts that are aching to feel seen and held in their experience. You’re not alone. We’re not alone.

Tell us the story of your book’s current title. Was it easy to find, or did it take forever?

Being Human: You Signed Up For This sort of fell into my lap one day while I was having a bit of a temper tantrum, as one does when you’re just fed up with life life-ing a bit too hard. In typical Sam fashion, I was video chatting with my best friend and verbally processing my dysregulation, and eventually ended up talking my way right back to regulation. I joked about how I know I must have picked “hard mode” when I came into this life, because, “damn, am I exhausted by everything right now…but I know it’s worth it. Everything I am releasing, everything I am working on, I know it’s worth it for what I am moving towards. I know I signed up for this.” Then a song by Maisie Peters played through my head. The lyrics, “you signed up for this…” lilted through my mind, and I could see it on the cover of my book. I signed up for this existence. I signed up for these lessons. When it comes to feeling the full extent of this human existence: I signed up for this.

If your book had a soundtrack, what are some songs that would be on it?

I actually crafted an official* (*unofficial) soundtrack for Being Human: You Signed Up For This on Spotify and Apple Music! It includes “Hellevator” (and “Phobia” and “Awaken” and ” I am YOU”) by Stray Kids, “Wishes” by Tiny Habits, “Funny Story” by Cate, “ilomilo” by Billie Eilish, “Anyway” by Noah Kahan, and several others because I don’t know how to make a short playlist hahaha. Played in order, it follows the pacing of my book from all-out despair to hopeful renewal, and even has the title of my book as the songs bookending the playlist: “Being Human” by Skrux ft. Mona Moua & “You Signed Up For This” by Maisie Peters.

What books are you reading (for research or comfort) as you continue the writing process?

I have had trouble balancing my reading with writing, honestly, but I managed to beta and ARC read twice for my good friend, Jessica Norton, who released her own beautiful books this year. Huckleberry and All Our Ghosts are fantastic, with female main characters I would fight for—given the chance—and male protagonists that continually raise my standards. If they’re impossibly high, you can thank Jessica and her MMCs, Crew Cassidy and Holden Nash.

Where is your favorite place to write?

I have a very intentionally selected group of places where I thrive while writing. One is the lake near my house. I love just hanging out on the dock, getting rocked by the waves, and soaking up the sun while I fill journals with line after line of prose (in pen, because we’re not scared anymore).

What is one thing you hope readers take away from reading your book? How do you envision your perfect reader?

I hope my readers feel seen and loved in their human journeys. Having a tender heart in a world that values grit is not for the weak. It is for those of us who have the courage of our conviction to evolve and thrive in this life. I see you, brave explorer. You’ve got this.

Are you a writer, too? Submit your manuscript to Atmosphere Press.