Eight-Year-Old Monster, by Cody Schaefer

What does it mean to be a monster? Is it dangerous? Is it fun? Do people hate you? Do they like you?

I’ve got the answers on speed dial, and I’ve got to admit, I couldn’t care less about anyone’s two cents on the matter.

I’m your not-so-average eight-year-old on a mission to carve out a life that’s entirely my own. Will I choose to become an unstoppable force of magical marvels? You bet your enchanted socks I will! Does this journey make a whole bunch of folks around me more than a little uneasy? You bet your bottom gold piece! Do I occasionally find myself in a spot of trouble over it? Well, that all depends on how you define “trouble.”

But hey, enough of my rambling! Grab a seat, whether it’s a chair, a cozy sheet fort, a trusty old lamp, or even enlist your significant other as a living footrest—whatever floats your boat! Prepare to dive in, chuckle a bit at my escapades, and lose yourself in a tale that’s bound to tickle your funny bone.

Trust me, you’re in for quite the ride!