I Always Wanted to Love Her (The Tunnel of Terror), by Gina Bruno Interdonato

Gina Bruno Interdonato grew up in a house where horrible things were happening on Long Island—a place she called the “tunnel of terror,” where love was conditional, and silence was survival. Behind closed doors, her mother ruled with rage, wielding words and weapons alike. From childhood beatings to teenage torment, Gina learned to bury her pain deep, clinging to slivers of safety in the arms of kind neighbors, secret poems, and fleeting first loves.

But when her mother—once a figure of fear—was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, Gina found herself thrust into the role of caregiver. What followed was a slow, painful unraveling of secrets, and with them, a surprising path to compassion. In learning her mother’s buried truths, Gina uncovered her own strength—and the possibility of healing.

A searing memoir of resilience, family, and grace, I Always Wanted to Love Her is both a personal reckoning and a testament to the power of breaking the cycle. With unflinching honesty and hard-won wisdom, Interdonato proves that even in the darkest stories, redemption can be written.

“Gina Bruno Interdonato’s powerful and poignant memoir, The Tunnel of Terror, allows the reader entry into the darkness of growing up with a mother who was physically and verbally abusive. Employing brutal honesty, this harrowing story demonstrates how it is possible to grow into adulthood with a kind and open heart, and even begin to love and understand the mother who had battled her own personal demons.”

— Pamela L. Laskin, Author of Ronit and Jamil (2017); Why No Goodbye (2019), and The Lost Language of Crazy (2022)