An Interview with Chris Cavendish

A common question Chris hears when revealing his book’s title is ‘So, you’re a narcissist, then?’ Of course, the right thing to do is to answer the question in the spirit it’s meant: graciously. But it does cross his mind: how often does Richard Osman get asked if he’s a psychopathic serial killer? The truth is, we’re all narcissistic to varying degrees. Serial killers – hopefully not.

What fascinates Chris most are the machinations of modern-day human frailty, and his debut adult novel is underpinned by significant research into the condition of covert narcissism. Although the book is pure fiction, a key motivator for writing it was the prospect of helping anyone in a current or past traumatic relationship where psychological abuse and control are, or were, all too real. In those situations, “why” is perhaps the one question that remains unexplained.

Fortunate that writing can now take centre stage in his life, Chris intends to write widely and passionately. His next title gets under the skin of another form of human frailty – the criminal underworld of scamming. Not through a master hustler, but simply an ‘Ordinary Joe’ next door, whose back is truly against the wall.

Born in North Wales and having experienced a diverse career that spanned market research, entrepreneurship, and education, Chris has now embraced the digital nomad life and splits his time between Europe and Asia.

Who/what made you want to write? Was there a particular person, or particular writers/works/art forms that influenced you?

I must have read just about every single Agatha Christie back in my childhood. I loved her ability to involve me in the sleuthing process. That and craft a semi-plausible set of circumstances for murdering off family members! In my later teens, I found JD Salinger, Tom Sharpe, and Joseph Heller. And then I fell in love with the lucid character-building and storytelling of DH Lawrence.

Once I’d completed the first draft of my book, I read You by Caroline Kepnes, knowing it was a strong comparable title. I wanted my story to be authentic, so I didn’t want You to be an influence during the initial story and character development.

What inspired you to start writing this book?

A friend of mine has been in a relationship with a covert narcissist. Over a bottle of wine or two, she shared everything he’d put her through, which was a pretty gruesome listen. As I reflected on what I’d heard, it struck me that she had no idea why he was doing it. I asked her later, somewhat cautiously, if she thought it would help others to gain the perspective of the narcissist, rather than the victim. I was concerned she might think narcissists were being championed or eulogised. To my surprise, she said it was a great idea. Had she not, I might not have written it.

Tell us the story of your book’s title. Was it easy to find, or did it take forever?

It was the first thing I committed to, and I never considered changing it. That, and the first line of the book, were there from the outset. Post-completion, a book marketer proposed changing the title. But I closed that off straight away. For me, a diary is perhaps the only medium in which a narcissist can open up on their innermost feelings and actions, because diaries are meant to be secret, and the last thing these people want is exposure. So, the bigger challenge was finding a reason for him to share it.

If your book had a soundtrack, what are some songs that would be on it?

Goodness, that wouldn’t be a particularly uplifting album! Although I’m not sure what she’s singing about half of the time, maybe ‘Thank U’ by Alanis Morissette would be the lead track? With some Radiohead and The Smiths thrown in for good measure. And concluding with Johnny Cash singing ‘Ring of Fire’.

What other professions have you worked in? What’s something about you that your readers wouldn’t know?

I have three degrees in mathematics, if you would you believe it, and my first job was as a consultant statistician for a fast-moving-consumer-goods multinational. Then, the bulk of my career was spent in education, where I was the dean of three U.K.-based business schools. I guess few readers would expect a wannabe fiction author could major in mathematics? My passion was always English Literature, but my father convinced me it wouldn’t pay well.

What books did you read (for research or comfort) throughout your writing process?

I didn’t read any books, but I listened to many podcasts and read copious blogs on narcissism. I first tried documenting it all, but in the end, I just grabbed a blank sheet of paper and mind-mapped every piece of learning I could recall. That gave me the basis for building the protagonist’s character arc. Since it was now a random scattering of nuances, rather than a rigorous sequential list, his character development was less rigid and structured. A narcissist is essentially a chaotic and irrational individual, so I feel this gave him more authenticity, compared to ticking off fifty or so “must-have” traits.

What advice would you give your past self at the start of your writing journey?

I guess like many newbie novel writers, I was massively daunted by the word count and terrified of hitting writer’s block. It’s like taking those first few steps of climbing a mountain. So, my advice would be what you hear many more experienced writers say, which is to just commit to the daily word target you’ve set (2,000 words) and get that first draft down on paper. Don’t worry about the quality, it’s just about getting a foundation of the story in place. The rewrite took longer for me than the first draft, but it was so much easier because I knew I had a raw yet complete manuscript in the bank. I see the rewrite as walking back down the mountain – you’ve reached the summit, but you still need to get home.

What’s one thing you hope sticks with readers after they finish your book?

I suspect it’s going to be a tough read because many of my readers will have their own narcissistic relationship experience to compare it to. This was never intended to be a self-help book, but in some ways, I hope it can be. I want those who have had similar encounters to realise it’s not, in any way, their fault. They’ve been connived, seduced, conned…whatever word you choose…into first believing, then trusting, and ultimately loving a monster. I hope getting a glimpse of what kind of thinking and scheming goes on in that monster’s mind will make them see that none of it was their doing.

Are you a writer, too? Submit your manuscript to Atmosphere Press.